How can one small word pack such a powerful debilitating punch? Because we give it the power, that’s why.
Marianne Williamson said it best. Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
In that quote an even more powerful statement was made-Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do.
Fear is nothing more than what you make it.
Born in your mind out of assumption and judgement, this little word can stop you from ever trying anything at all, every time.
Fear keeps you from achieving your goals or manifesting what you want.
Fear grows from the dependance of approval.
Questions begin to arise in your head wondering if you will fail even before you get started.
I want to write a book but I can’t. I question whether or not I am going to succeed if I write it. My thoughts are about what people will think when they read it. I begin to fear their rejection even before I write. The whole time, my fear of writing a book is not about failing. It is magnified by me on whether or not I will succeed. I create the fear of failure in my mind. This process keeps me from writing a book not because I don’t know how, I write all the time in this blog. My question is whether it will be good enough. But the bigger fear I have is based on the chance that it will be great!
Fear is not some big ugly monster you should be afraid of.
Fear is made up to keep you right where you’re comfortable. Even if that place does not feel good, it is familiar.
Fear is imagined in your head. Growing bigger and bigger emotionally as you place doubt in your abilities to achieve success.
Fear is defined in Webster’s Dictionary to be afraid of (something or someone) to expect or worry about (something bad or unpleasant).
Is it more accurate to say that fear is actually a strong emotion caused by the feeling of an unpleasant loss? The loss you suffer is your inability to become what you believe you can be, once you get past the fear of something feeling unpleasant. The unpleasantness you feel is success.
If you’ve grown accustom to a meager lifestyle but dream of becoming the next rock star there is a disconnect in what is real for you. How can you be a rock star when you are Molly unknown from Piedmont, SD population 222.
Fear can be a dream killer for sure.
There are ways to stop fear in its tracks. Never to harm you or your dreams ever again.
Here are a few concepts I work with to derail the fears effects.
1. Stop measuring what other people are achieving. This one step can keep you from agonizing that you are not capable, thereby calming the fear monster growing inside you. I keep Marianne’s words where I can see them since she said it best-We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
2. You can take steps in spite of your fear. Fear can’t stop you. You do. You have the power to choose your thoughts and shift your perspective. This part takes a bit of training your mind, but it can be done. After all, look at those successful people you’re judging yourself against. They’ve done it, so can you! God made sure we all started out on the same level. If you choose your dreams and goals making them the priority, you will overcome fear and continue forward movement.
3. Fear is harmless when you tackle it head on. Go towards fear. Don’t back down. Write out every scenario you can think of to why you are afraid in the first place. When you out everything you’ve now weakened its strength. Believe you have the power. Fear is nothing without you fueling it.
4. Work with the unsurmountable evidence you’ve achieved so far. You’ve dealt with and overcome fear before. Remember your first day of school? Your first boyfriend. You first breakup. Your first job. Your first anything!! You made it through a lot of challenges before. Remembering back, there were so many firsts in my life. The evidence shows I overcame all of them, but at the time I was so afraid my heart could have beat right out of my chest.
5. Deal with any anger you have. Fear is the catalyst that fuels anger. Think bully in the school yard. Bullies are usually weaker and more fearful of being found out, which is why they are angry and lash out. Being weak is not something to fear. You feel weak because you fail to honor your importance to this world. When you honor your heart and follow your dreams even while you fear rejection, you conquer fear and eliminate anger. And you accomplish most anything you set out to achieve.
6. Get help. Seek out people that have overcome your type of challenges. Learn from them.
7. I know this is mentioned as a solution for everything, but that’s because it is…..meditate! Learn how to meditate, allowing you to quiet your thoughts to get in touch with your true self-worth originating from your soul. Here is where you get accurate information. Your soul speaks from truth. Learn to trust it.
Fear really is nothing more than thoughts manifested by not following what you feel you should do in the first place. Pay attention to those pangs of unsettledness in your gut that tell you, you should start a business, write a book, become an artist or follow your dream of being rock star. Whatever your gut is telling you, listen! If you don’t, fear and anger begin to develop from thoughts you place on why you shouldn’t do what you think and feel you should.
Fear doesn’t stand a chance when the heart is involved. Really it can be an ally. It shows you your deepest truest desires.
The more you take action based on what your heart is telling you, the more fear is defeated.
When in doubt the right thing to do is always based in love.
What a truly amazing world this could be if we all got passed the fear of being successful!