I feel as if I’m accomplishing nothing!! That could be because I’m not.
Or should I really be considering it as doing nothing?
Here I sit on a Sunday afternoon in my bathrobe or (what my husband calls my whooby blanket, since I’m so attached to it, and in it, often for long periods of time), doing nothing.
I’m feeling bad. Seemingly wanting to beat myself up with language going around in my thoughts such as, you’re wasting time…there’s so much to be done around here (meaning there’s several projects that need my attention as we’re currently remodeling our house. Not to mention my messy, needing to be cleaned, house) and I hear myself saying “and yet you’re sitting here doing nothing….what are you thinking wasting this wonderful day, you should be outside doing yard work or going for a bike ride.” Ugh….Shut up already!!
And yet, here I sit feeling as though I shouldn’t feel bad at all.
Victor, Victoria, comes to mind.
I need a rest, I work all week long, and we were gone out of town all day yesterday.
Actually, it’s not that I’m not doing ‘nothing.’ I’m watching TV while reading blog articles looking outside at how wonderful it looks out there. Laughing….This is something right??
Well, on one side of me, the Victoria side, it’s plenty, but Victor is a little miffed.
Why do I feel so bad?
Why do I have two personalities wanting to duke it out right now?
Learned behavior is all.
It’s because we as a society seem to be so programmed to always having to be doing something. When, in fact, doing what I’m doing right now should be just fine.
Actually I’m living in the moment and that’s a good thing.
Aside from when I turn my head and Victor shows up dictating that I NEED to be doing something, I’m quite content to be sitting here doing nothing. 🙂
I’m just doing what I think is best for me at this moment, and that’s not all bad is it?
It’s really not that I haven’t done anything at all today. I’ve managed to get a few plants, that desperately needed water, watered. There are even more sitting in the kitchen sink. At least I managed to get this much done.
Really, this only happened because I was feeling worse for my plants than I was about laying around. 🙂
And then, Victor had to remind me that I need to get up and get to doing something just as I saw a man go by on his bicycle. Way to go fella.. At least you’re listening to your Victor.
I’m not going to let myself feel guilty about not being out there doing the same thing…well, I’ll work on that. Maybe by tonight, when it’s dark, I won’t feel so guilty about it. 🙂
And now, I’m being forced to get up…not a problem handyman (my electrician husband) is yelling from the rafters, he needs my help with the wiring project he’s currently working on.
Off I go…I guess Victor won this round. 🙂