Life doesn’t always have to be this way!!!
Around the holidays, especially, I find myself gravitating to the Hallmark channel.
LOVE is in the air there. Not so much, in my family. 🙁
I don’t believe there’s a family that doesn’t have some dysfunction, although there are those with a lesser degree.
For me, I guess I just need a reminder that there can be people that don’t judge you or what you’ve become. They love you no matter what!
This year is not unlike the years before. Although, this year has pretty much kicked my ass in a lot of ways. There was a lot of defeating thoughts happening in this head. Question whether I can accomplish anything at all. Thoughts like “What are you thinking????” “I CAN’T do this!!” “I don’t have the education to accomplish that!” “I don’t know how to do that!” “I can’t figure it out!!” How am I going to learn all of that???” And of course more!! And all of it going back and forth over and over in my head.
There were even times when I told Handyman, (my husband) that I’d given up. If life is going to be like this all the time I really don’t care to be here any longer. But then SHUT UP rings through my ears.
As a teacher of the law of attraction, I know very well making a statement like that attached to that much emotion I might as well be as good as dead because I’ll be creating it.
You get what you’re asking for whether it be right or wrong. The universe must deliver. And this year there’s been a lot of just plain yucky feelings. And A LOT of loneliness.
I don’t see my family any longer. It’s been over a year now with no signs of anything changing on that front. I am, in an essence, an only child. Which is not all bad, however I grew up as 1 of 5 children.
One of my brothers died three years ago in an unexpected accident and to this day it still affects me. For me as a medium, it has slowed my healing process. I spent the better part of two years helping him on the other side find his place and only now has it been time for me. As others have seemingly moved on I am feeling left behind sad and lonely.
We moved three years ago to a place in the country that offers peace and tranquility. But also needs a lot of work. Handyman gets to drive away each morning. I do not. Since I work out of my home office, I live with it 24/7. It’s getting old. And as of late there has been a deafening silence with the quiet around here. I’ve been craving interaction. Not unlike most people recently.
The first six months of 2014 have been about relationships. The need to repair the relationship you have with yourself. And then moving into working on the relationships with other people that are around you.
Well, I must have started earlier since I was forced to see nothing ever changing, or at least for right now, the relationships I had with my mother and siblings. I had no choice but to walk away. For the sake of keeping my sanity. I was finally forced to look at the situation as it was. They did not understand me. Or how I’ve grown. Or what my thoughts are about. They wanted me to be what they think I should be. And, in truth I wanted them to be a certain way around me. I wanted their interaction with how I am today. Not what I was like as a child. I wanted them to understand my thoughts about life. But they do not. It became increasingly hard to be around them. There was a lot of friction which always ended badly. I always ended up hurt feeling destroyed. Being taken out of context. I was always saying the wrong thing. And never understood. I knew it was time. Although it hurt like hell, I needed to do what was right for me. I needed to save my sanity. Or what is left of it…LOL. I needed to walk away and never go back. Or at least to this point never go back.
And true to form this year, if there is no likely hood of repair then there is no longer a place for those people in your life. This year there was an energetic opening that says no longer will lower vibrational energetic people be allowed in your space. They will be gone no matter what. Although, I never rule out the possibility of someone changing their vibrational level at which point they will be back in your life. It can happen. However, try as you may, as I did for years attempting to keep them close. If they cannot hold a similar energetic level to you, they will be gone. Poof!! It’s that fast! They’re gone! On the other hand, how anything happens in your life will be based on the actions that come about for you. Mine was family and friends. For you, it may be that you’ve been in a relationship with a partner for some time and one day it’s over. For whatever reason they want out. Or you could go to work one day realizing there is no one there that you want to be around nor do they wish to be around you. Just a couple of examples of how this has been working. Poof gone!! No salvaging. There just seems to be no room for lower energy in your space. And rightfully so. Energy is like an elevator floor. Going up feels great! 🙂 Going down not so good. 🙁 When you’re on the lower level you quickly become fatigued. Irritable, anxious, frustrated and even angry. Increasingly it becomes impossible to be with those people for very long.
I’m not saying they’re bad people. However, they’re just not on your elevator floor, so it’s hard for you to be around them. They go away not because you want them too, but because they cannot be there with you. Much like having a friend in the second grade when you’re in the third. You are forced to go to your respective classes when the bell rings. You just stop seeing them. You forget to call or vice versa. You no longer have anything in common. They go on to find others like them while you do the same. It’s all good really. However, it’s a time of incredible sadness. And to make matters worse this happens not only with people but also with the places you frequent and material possessions you have around.
This summer I ended up giving away so many of my clothes that I had very little to wear. I couldn’t buy new things fast enough. Places Handyman and I frequented no longer hold the same excitement. So we don’t go to them any longer. Makes for a blah date night. “Honey let’s have a date night!” “Okay, where shall we go???” “Oh, I don’t know….sigh…nothing feeling fun…. how about we just stay home.” Nothing seems like any fun anymore. Blahhhhhh!!
And then if all of this was not enough. The latter half of this year is about communication. Six long months worth!! Let’s just really mix up this crap! Not only do I feel shitty about losing so much in my life, you now need to learn how to clearly communicate how crappy you really feel. Communicating everything that needs to be revealed. Starting with yourself leading out to others.
You can no longer lie to yourself. If you’re one that thinks, you’re not that smart. Telling yourself that by thinking it. Or feels too fat judging yourself against others. Or feels, or is, under-confident. Feel free to add in what’s coming to you…. You now will be forced to deal with the whole host of self-sabotage you’ve got going on. I’m not immune to this factor at all. At times, on a daily basis I can play all of that and more in my head. It’s about getting clear about the words you’ve been using against yourself to undermine your abilities.
And of course, it doesn’t stop there.
You were, and are directed to communicate your fears, concerns, and everything in between to everyone around you.
It’s just been one of those years!!
This is a growing year for sure!
Which is all good for you! In the end you’ll be a better person for it. However, while you’re experiencing it, it can be hard sometimes to cope.
But!!! This year has been a great year for me as well!!! I’ve learned more than I have before. And even with all the loneliness I’ve been able to move through all of this, and more, faster and easier than ever before.
Which is why I’m offering a free class to finish 2014! I’m in LOVE! I Love The Life I have! Well, most of the time…..LOL. Are you afraid to love your life? For fear, it will be all you get? Many times you can’t even see a better life coming because you’re unwilling to go for it.
The lessons that came to me over this year have generated a need to go for it!! A LOVE in my heart for all things. Finally, there is LOVE in my heart for myself which has grown outward enabling me to love all things much easier than ever before. I love the people in my life! And those that have left my life. I no longer feel the need to frequent places that no longer feel fun. And those that I’ve found to replace them feel more exciting. And to all the things that need to go I am able to see and accept the reasoning behind it. 🙂 All of which, up till now, I’ve fought so hard to keep.
I’ve found I’ve been able to let freely go of all of it. There’s no hoarding happening around here. 🙂
This is why I’m offering this FREE ONLINE CLASS!!
If this is resonating with you please join me in this four week interactive online class learning how to accept who you are? Accept where you’re at in your life. Accept your thought process. It’s there at this point where you’ll be able to create more in your life enabling you to feel really GOOD!! Even if there is no other person on earth that thinks like you, you’ll be able to keep a smile on your face enjoying all of what life has to offer!!
Here’s a look as some of what will be happening.
- Learning how to create and use a mandala. A shaman’s way of seeing into your soul. Enabling you to see what your soul wants. Ego free.
- You’ll be meditating. Meditation helps you to calm down entering a place of letting go creating an understanding of what’s happening to you letting it all flow with ease.
- Raising your Kundalini…that unseen ball of energy that keeps us alive. Healthy and happy. You’ll learn how to get it moving keeping it moving full force!
- Learning how to LOVE all things. Which means there needs to be some forgiveness involved. A very good thing! Forgiving helps you heal!! It helps bring an end to pain and suffering. It helps you move on. Instead of trying to force something that is not working for you, you can now move on to the life you’ll actually love not being concerned any longer.
This class is a bit of all of what I do.
- Accessing my intuition.
- Flower essence’s or combo’s will be recommended if you are finding yourself stuck.
- Coaching techniques that I use in my practice.
- Suggestions for herbal remedies and combinations to use for healing issues that need to be addressed in the physical body.
- And so much more!!
Class starts Tuesday December 16th at 7:00 PM Central Time!
We’d love to have you join in!!
Register below or for more information CLICK HERE